MY VIEWS ON UTANG NA LOOB:


Utang na loob or reciprocity has two faces. It could be both good and bad. The good thing about it we Filipinos give credits to the good things done to us by others. We show our appreciation by this reciprocity because we believe in the saying: "Do unto others what you want others do unto you". Filipinos are known to be appreciative. Whatever good that has done to us was considered as utang na loob to that person. The bad thing is that due to it and due to hiya we sometimes let others step on us because we think of the amount of kindness we received from the must be returned with an equal amount of kindness not realizing that we have our rights as a person. For me it should not always be returned equally with kindness. It still depends on the situation. If you think your rights are being stepped on then you must think of yourself.


MY VIEWS ON PAGTITIIS:


Filipinos are known to be matiisin. No matter how grave the situation is we endure it for the sake of something or someone because we know that it pays off. We are always hopeful that someday our sacrifices will be replaced something better. I experience this kind of situation when I worked on a fast food. I used to do nothing at home but I have to earn because I want to finish my studies so I have to sacrifice my leisurely life. I have to stick to schedules and maximize my potentials. There came the time where I have to walk from my workplace to my former school just to get delivery orders the after the end of my contract I moved into the field of sales as a sales person where I have to wear two inches high stilettos and stand there the whole day during a 3 day sale but I didn't complain because I know I am doing this for my own good and I know that my hard work is paid in a reasonable price and it pays off. That is how enduring Filipinos are. They sacrifice, believing that something good will happen after having a hard time.

       One of the greatest battles of all is the battle for social acceptance. Good gracious I have been through the fire, through the rain, before I experience the feeling of being socially accepted. When you're different, then you're a reject. Damn the majority! I've been singing Green Day's Minority song the whole day because I'm a weirdo during my preschool to highschool years. I have been a wallflower to them because I have a different perspective in  life.

      I have lived in the world of drama queens and drama kings. I remembered that day when I was in preschool. My teacher borrowed the hair accessory of one of my classmates. She carefully took it out of her hair then my classmate cried with something as simple as that. I never cried in school despite of the fact that everyone is trying to put me down that is why I am wondering, "What's the big deal if a teacher borrows your hair accessory?"

      They label me as insensitive. They call me names like android, manhid and baliw. It's because no matter what they do I don't cry but ofcourse I have a reason for that. My parents encouraged me not to be a crybaby in school because they can't always look after me during class hours. I bear that in mind that's why even if they hurt me physically, my tears won't fall. I simply ignore them til they get tired of trying to make me cry. I don't know what's the big deal why they want me to cry when I really don't want to.

       I get used to it as time passes, I cannot even feel the pain when someone hit me. I just try to avoid the people around me. I get along on school activities but the fact that I will hang out with them outside school premises, it's a no for me. Since I was a kid I hold grudges. Once someone hurts me, what they've done to me was tattooed across my whole life and I will not let it pass.

      The bad thing about the people around me during those years is that they consider small matters as big ones and big ones as small ones. They think that it is a big deal that I don't cry so they try so hard to make me cry when the real big deal is they are doing something to me that is unforgivable just because they want to do something as epic as making me cry. Imagine how I endure all of those mockeries, all of the beatings, all of the bullying, for almost 8 years of my life as a student.

      Social acceptance is that hard to achieve even if  you are strong enough. Maybe those childish attempts to make me cry had gone during my highschool years but they replaced physical pain by making me a wallflower. Yet I was strong. As I grow up I learned that I have to speak up. Those were the times I finally develop my own beliefs and fight for it.

      I guess as we grow up and gain experience, the more socially acceptable we become. I never thought that a reject like me could end up working in a cashier then as a salesperson because I thought that I will never be socially acceptable anymore. I realized that all I need was confidence and attitude or what they call swagger in urban terms. All my past insecurities drown in flames as time pass. I can say now that I'm socially accepted because I feel confident about myself and my ability to socialize.

        According to Horacio Dela Costa the Filipino national tradition is composed of, first of the five he enumerated, pagsasarili. Which is defined as priciple of self-reliance. He said that us Filipinos are self-reliant. I believe in this one because I exercise this tradition. I am the type who never depends on other people especially when working on a project, I want to do it individually. It is not that I am a loner. I just believe in my capacities. Filipinos have a strong determination to do things their own. They believe that they can reach their goal with or without the help of others. It does not mean that we are selfish, we are just known to believe in what we can do. We rely on our instincts but still we want to be part of something and that is where pakikisama appears. Ofcourse we don't want to be labeled as "FOREVER ALONE". We mingle with people and share stories with them. We are even known to be flexible in terms of socialization. We easily adapt with people around us.

      Pagkakaisa somehow is a little questionable for me. Dela Costa stated that national unity is our tradition but seeing the country today I realized that comically it is only exercise during the fights of Manny Pacquiao then after that it is a do-your-thing-and-i'll-do-mine policy again. We are slowly losing this tradition. We couldn't even cooperate with our president. Where's the unity in that when even in a small group projects teamwork is not exercised? I guess this is the tradition we must bring back in our country. Let us not depend on one person to be able to build a better economy. I bet we should start helping each other than sticking to the crab mentality which ruins our concept of pagkakaisa.

      Pagkabayani in the modern Philippine society is greatly credited to our OFWs. Well, my father is an OFW who represents Philippines in a foreign territory. He bravely faced the challenge of serving other country for his family and for the pride of his homeland. There are also the Philippine Army who risk their lives to fight for our country. Each of us can be a hero by doing something to protect our country's rights and reputations and to do something in the name of our country. I believe that this one still exist in each of us who value our nationality.

      Lastly, Filipinos are known for pakikipagkapwa. As mentioned above, Filipinos always want to be part  of something and we also want to be in good terms with everyone so we have this tradition. We respect each others opinion that is why Filipinos are good communicators. Wherever a Filipino settles with this trait they can build good relationships.

"Camilo Osias was a nationalist who consistently struggled for Philippine independence throughout his life."


      He enumerated five characteristics of a Filipino traits which is hospitality, politeness, modesty, devotion of family ties and love of home. I have written earlier about my own perspective on Filipino values and most of them is also included in his account.

       I believe that those characteristics of a Filipino given by Camilo Osias can exist on us in a different manner because in our generation today, our culture is slowly evolving and adapting with the changing world but that does not mean that we completely lose all of those key traits, we still contain them but in a different way rather than what is defined as the traditional one. Like in hospitality, Filipinos are known to be hospitable in a very unique way. Traditionally, Filipinos give the highest importance to people they considered as visitors. They put all their attention to you, treat you like a VIP. It is shown even in my family, they show the same hospitality discussed in the topic like when a guest arrives they serve the best food. They keep attending to the needs of the guest with no hesitations, but in my part hospitality is not that exaggerated. When a guest arrives I don't bring put all my beautiful kitchen wares just for a good impression. I do just the usual, talk to them, entertain them but not to the point that I buy a hundred buck food for them to eat. I usually wait for the guest to say that they are hungry then give whatever I have on the fridge. My mom always scold me for that. I don't know. It's not my thing to be over-attending to the guest needs especially if I am not that close with the person. It's not even my thing to say ingat whenever a guest leaves. I will just yell a loud bye and get  back to business because I usually  forgot to say ingat. I'm used to just saying goodbye. It's not that I'm being rude or what. Maybe I can be a little maladaptive with that one cause I hate it when people exaggerate things but still I never neglect the guest or act rudely. I still show the same level of courteousness as most Filipinos show, the thing is I don't exaggerate. This is an instance of change in our culture. We may practice hospitality but not in a manner of our national tradition but still is socially acceptable and still can be defined as being hospitable.

      Politeness in us Filipinos has a special theme which is the po and opo and the pagmamano. As said during the discussions I have attended, Filipinos show a different way of being polite in a sense that we use both the po and opo and the pagmamano to give respect to people older than us and also using the titles, ate  and kuya, as a respect for our older brothers and sisters is really an exceptional thing to do. We pay attention to titles unlike in the US where you could just simple call someone by their name even when it comes to their parents. Although in the culture of my family, po and opo depends on closeness. If you're close enough to a relative you can drop it. Like me to my mom and dad, it's fine skipping the po and opo thing because the level of our closeness is high but still we give respect to each other.

      Modesty has something to do with our humbleness. This is the really weird thing I observed in us Filipinos. I always here these phrases in my fellow countrymen, "Nakakahiya naman", especially when eating at someone else's house, or when given a token of appreciation. Even me who used to skip traditions and live in the modern culture exercise this term. Sometimes I hate it because it just serves for me as an expression so I will not appear boastful in the public. It's like a term for plastics because sometimes we just use it to keep ourselves on the ground when the word "Thanks" is more appropriate to say. Why are we so pa-humble? Well, according to what I've learned we don't want our reputation to be stained by intrigues. We always want a clean slate but I think it is not right. I think Filipinos must change their views about modesty and understand that we have to express what we feel in a situation cause I have observed that we have the fear of rejection so we hold back and just stick with that hiya. I think we have to understand self-expression more because if we always hide our feelings in hiya, we will not be able to move forward.

       Another characteristic given by Camilo Osias is Devotion to Family Ties which for me is the undying Filipino quality because all of us, traditional or not, we give the highest priority to our family. Blood is thicker than water for us Filipinos. We will never neglect our family. We will do anything for our family and that is one trait I really like about us. Although when exaggeration gets in the way, because in my opinion Filipinos tend to exaggerate things, the word dependence seeps in. I don't really like the idea of a parent who still doesn't give enough independence when their children turns 18. That is what I observe in most Filipino families. They still treat their 18 year old children as if they were in highschool which is wrong in some cases because they need to grow up. They need independence. I know it is because they love their kids and they are only concerned about them but they forbid them to gain experience. Somehow, in conclusion to that, I adore how Filipinos value their family.

       Lastly, the trait that I could never ever separate from me is love of home. No matter what happens I will always be proud that I am a Filipino. No matter how ugly is our reputation to other countries I will never deny my roots. This trait circulates around the globe, Filipinos will always be proud for their nationality that is why Ninoy Aquino said that Filipinos are worth dying for. We are always patriotic. It is just disappointing that I have read a post by Ms. Angie Ligot from Facebook cussing about her own nationality. She is a freak. She must die. It was sad to find out that some of us managed to reject our own homeland.

       Oh well Mr. Osias, you give a really good impression to our values. As for me, even if i miss some traits you have given in my personality I will always carry those values with me and so to all of us.

         The best definition of values for me is that it is our ideas, opinions and beliefs that are special to us. Ofcourse, I saw it on google but that definition matches how I define values. Values for me is the traits we mostly possess that we considered the best in us. It is what makes us unique and exceptional to other people. Our values tells something about us. It tells something about the culture we originated from. It tells something about our family and personality.